Forgiveness Opportunities
This week, a few incidents happened that would have previously sent me right into anger, frustration, upset, and stress. This time, instead of viewing each occurrence with resistance and dread, I noticed the speed at which my mind went to viewing them as forgiveness opportunities. I noticed my body calmed down much quicker, my breath was normal, and my forehead and eyes were serene – despite anything that was going on around me. To continue to build my forgiveness muscle, I decided today that I am starting a new weekly tradition. On Fridays, I am going to journal on the forgiveness opportunities that were presented to me throughout the week. Anything that brings me upset in any form (annoyance, frustration, anger, guilt, regret, judgement, resentment, etc.) is the perfect forgiveness opportunity.
I have a “sticky note” by my bed with “forgiveness” written on it, but I have to admit I am not always good at letting everything go the same day. Sometimes I have some more releasing I need to do in order to let it go. That’s what this weekly journaling opportunity will afford. Eventually, I will not need to do this and I will just automatically forgive everything right away – I am not quite there yet.
So I know inquiring minds want to know what happened this week, so here it is. On Tuesday, my computer started going really slow and something told me this was not just a typical slow internet moment. Then, menus started flashing across the screen, everything went black, and the computer shut down. When I powered it back up, it did the same thing. My mind would have normally went to all of the things I had on the computer (documents, photos, music, etc.), and all of the work I needed to get done, but instead I was like “looks like I have a virus.” I called IT and they informed me that it was not a virus – my hard drive failed and would need to be replaced. They mentioned they may or may not be able to save my files and that I would not have my computer back for 4-5 days. Meanwhile, I was working on a grant proposal that needed to be submitted the following day. After a brief “aw, man” moment, I sent my boss an email informing him of what was going on and that I would indeed still have the document complete the following day. I dropped my computer off to get it fixed, and that was that. There was nothing else I could do. As I was driving away, I was forgiving myself. For not saving all of my files elsewhere (I had many of them on a thumb drive, but not all of them). For not turning my computer off each night. For not noticing signs of my computer’s hard drive failing. For having to re-write the proposal for work. For anything that was causing me upset in that moment.
Anytime someone of something is causing you upset, it’s an opportunity to forgive.
On Wednesday, my 1.5 year old son was playing on the playground at school and fell forehead first on the concrete. He had fallen about a month ago at school and had another rather large scar on his head already. The first time it happened, I was really upset. I felt like the teachers weren’t watching him, and I was really sad that he would have a very large scar on his head (all of the skin came off on a circular shaped area on his forehead about the size of a quarter and he is brown skinned, so he has a large light spot on his head). Everytime I looked at him, I couldn’t help but notice it and tears would come to my eyes. I was finally “over” that incident, and now the school was calling to let me know he had another one on his head that was just as big. I couldn’t believe it. I called my husband right away and told him I was on my way to the school to pick him up. Initially, I was ready to transfer him out of the school and go have a serious talk with the Director (let’s just say, I wasn’t exactly going to say how much I loved the school ;-)). I sat for a minute and prayed to respond in love, and then I sent my husband the following text: Trying to remember this is a forgiveness lesson (like everything else). Praying before I go in there 🙂 . When I got to the school, the teacher admitted she wasn’t watching when he fell. She was also rather nonchalant in her explanation of the event. I just let her finish telling me the story, said “thank you for letting me know”, signed the incident sheet, and left the school. I decided not to have the talk with the Director that day so that I would be sure to respond from a calm place. The Assistant Director called later that night to express her sincere apologies…I accepted.
On Thursday, the daycare called me and I was thinking “what now?”. They said my 1.5 year old was stung by a bee on his face. Seriously??? All I could do is crack up when I got off the phone. What a week. I am so grateful for it though. It reminded me of the need to practice forgiveness until it just becomes a way of living. I know that whatever I don’t forgive now will come back up as a future lesson for me to learn – I might as well do it now! I have made the decision to live in love and light, and that means I really can’t harbor unforgiveness. Unforgiveness and unconditional love cannot coexist. I’m sure there are more tests to come and, with practice, I will be armed and ready to forgive on the spot. Then, and only then, will I experience the constancy of inner peace.
What forgiveness opportunities did you have this week?
An unforgiving thought does many things. In frantic action it pursues its goal, twisting and overturning what it sees as interfering with its chosen path. Distortion is its purpose, and the means by which it would accomplish it as well. It sets about its furious attempts to smash reality, without concern for anything that would appear to pose a contradiction to its point of view.
Forgiveness, on the other hand, is still, and quietly does nothing. It offends no aspect of reality, nor seeks to twist it to appearances it likes. It merely looks, and waits, and judges not. He who would not forgive must judge, for he must justify his failure to forgive. But he who would forgive himself must learn to welcome truth exactly as it is.
Do nothing, then, and let forgiveness show you what to do, through Him Who is your Guide, your Savior and Protector, strong in hope, and certain of your ultimate success. He has forgiven you already, for such is His function, given Him by God. Now must you share His function, and forgive whom He has saved, whose sinlessness He sees, and whom He honors as the Son of God. ~A Course in Miracles
Keep shining!
~Kandace
About the Author: Kandace Jones
I used to live life shackled by fear, doubt, and worry. I put on a happy face while navigating my day-to-day duties, but I was emotionally drained, stressed, and unhappy. When I hit rock bottom, and was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I was determined to live life differently. I knew there had to be another way. Out of that determination, and guidance from Spirit, the "Living in the Light" blog was born. It documents my spiritual journey out of the darkness and into the Light. After nine months of publicly sharing my journey, and consciously releasing my attachment to the ego, I experienced a powerful spiritual awakening. I went from living in fear, doubt, worry, and stress to complete inner peace. My greatest passion has become assisting others on their own journey to inner peace.
My spiritual memoir, From Stress to Peace: An Intimate Journal on the Journey from Living in Darkness to Living in the Light, is available now on Amazon and BN.com. Click the tabs at the top of the page to learn more about the From Stress to Peace 21-Day Challenge, Living in the Light Retreats, 1:1 sessions, and the Living in the Light Community - all of which are designed to support your journey to inner peace. I appreciate you taking the time to visit the blog and look forward to supporting you in any way I can!